One Month

Dustin wanted to take these pictures for blackmail when Harlowe is a teenager and giving us grief. These pictures are so funny, sorry Harlowe for putting them on the blog. She is almost one month old when these pictures were taken.

For the first month you loved to be held and hated to be on your back. You liked the swing but would only stay in the swing for an hour or so, but you loved the baby Bjorn. That was the best buy ever, you love to be close to your parents and as long as you are being held you are a perfect angel. We have to cook and clean with you in the baby Bjorn to please you. You are sleeping about one to two hours at a time and if we are lucky you will sleep three hours. You sleep in the bassinet area of the pack and play, right next to our bed. Sometimes you have been fussy at night around 6pm and all I can do is walk around with you and rock you. So we went to the lazy boy store and got a great glider, that you love. You are great in the car and car rides put you to sleep almost right away.

I thought I would be a domestic diva because I had three months off but I was a domestic flop. I couldn't really cook or clean, so Dustin really did all the cleaning and the cooking. He is suprisingly a great cook, he likes Bobby Flay and we bought a few cook books of his and Dustin made some great fish dishes from them. Thanks Dustin for being so supportive, I wish I could have been the cook in the family because I love, love, love to cook, I think it is my passion but I know I will pick it up again when she is older.

I love you Harlowe you are my perfect angel and I love you more and more each day and I would not change a thing, I love my life!

I was looking through the computer and I found these old pics of Dustin and I before Harlowe. The first one is from New Year's Eve shortly before Harlowe was conceived and the rest are from my first snowboarding experience in Lake Tahoe. I loved Lake Tahoe but the snowboarding thing was pretty hard. Dustin is really good at it so he was pretty bored on the bunny slopes but it was really fun and I had a great time, hopefully we can take Harlowe when she gets older. I wanted to include these because lately I have been having a hard time with the post baby weight thing. I never thought it would be so hard to lose the weight, because I exercised throughout my pregnancy and didn't go crazy with the eating thing. I only gained thirty three pounds I think but it is really hard to get it off. I thought I would hop right back into my jeans a couple of months after but wrong, oh so wrong. Everyone says if you breastfeed the pounds will just come off, so I am waiting, ha. Yesterday we went to eat with one of Dustin's best friends, Cody and Sydney, and they just had a baby also. Anyway, I was so excited because I got my jeans on over my thick thighs, not fat but thick - ha, and I actually buttoned them. Of course I wore them out but needless to say one false move and the button would fly off and pop someone in the eye. When I got home I had an indention on the sides of my legs where the seams had left impressions, I guess it was wishful thinking and I should put the pants down if I am ever going to wear them again in one piece. I guess this is too much info for some but hey, its a part of motherhood, I guess. Love you Harlowe and my thighs love you too, just kidding.

My first baby Harley, and yes they have matching names

Marilou coming to visit before bathtime

This is my good friend Marilou, she lives down the street from me and we carpool to work together. She trained me when I first started Texas Children's Hospital and reminds me of my mother because she has such a good heart, thanks Marilou for visiting! These are pics of Harlowe's first pimples or milia - technical term. My hormones did a wonder on her face and they lasted for about two to three weeks, but her face looks pretty good now. She is growing so fast and seems like she is changing each day, it is a journey but a great one.

Harley wondering what the heck is going on?

She loves lying in the water, maybe she will be a swimmer

Oh, the water is to hot

Peace people, no more paparazzi

The umbilical cord is finally off and now she can be submerged in the tub, which she loves. She likes bath time so hopefully she will like swimming. I cannot wait until the summer time when we can take her swimming. Dustin and I both swam in high school, but Dustin only did it for a short time. I really thought I could kick his butt in swimming because I did it for so long but last summer, he kicked my butt. The date of these pictures is 10/23/2009 and I am still emotional but getting used to the change. I really don't want to publish this but it is a diary, I really felt my life has taken a 360 and for a brief second, I felt like my life was over. Not really for a brief second, but it sounds better, ha. The highlight of these days were going to Target and getting a Carmel Brulee Late, oh soooo good, pretty sad right. I was feeling pretty bad about the whole thing but Dustin got me out of the house even if it was just to walk around the mall or even Target. It was good getting out of the house, and oh, I made the mistake of drinking a Venti Chi Tea Latte, not remembering it had caffeine. Oh no, it wasn't a good night, Harlowe doesn't groove on the caffeine and I learned my lesson. Even though I had such a hard time some days, I had some great ones and I know I sound like a broken record but I love being and mom. I have waited so long to get married and have a baby, I am so blessed and have the best life in the world. I thank God everyday for my family and great friends.

These pictures were after Harlowe's first cardiology appointment and after we took off the leads from the Holter monitor we went home with. So if your wondering why she is so mad and her chest is so red, the adhesive didn't agree with her delicate skin, my poor baby. Please excuse the boob pad in the background, I am not that computer savvy so I didn't know how to crop that part out. This was probably a little after the two week mark and I am getting pretty good at the breast feeding thing now but the hormones, ouch. Dustin will tell you it was like living with a crazy person, but he was so good to me and so supportive. Now that I reflect on that time, I really felt sorry for him, I was a mess. I was going stir crazy at home and I was trying to get used to all of her needs and wants so I couldn't always please her, combined with the lack of sleep was awful. I work at night so I am used to staying up at night but it seemed like every time I would put her down she would wake up an hour later. Although if she would sleep with me, we could get a good two hours. As a nurse, I know better than to sleep with my child but no one ever told you it would be so hard. I would cry in the middle of the night and get mad at Dustin because I felt like he could wake up and take a shower or go run errands without concern. But I had to plan my day to the tee, around breastfeeding, trying to pump and please my precious baby, it wasn't my best hour. Dustin and I did take Harlowe out in public around two weeks because if I didn't get out of the house I would have gone looney tooney. Luckily she didn't get the swine flu, ha and I kept my sanity. But I would not change a thing, motherhood is the best thing in the world and I love her more and more each day.

These are just some random pictures because I forgot to add to Harlowe's two week doctor's appointment, which was on October 23, 2009. As you can see I am so far behind but I will quit telling yall that! Anyway, she was 7lbs 12oz which is the 25% and her height was 20inches which is the 25% and her head circumference was 14inches which is the 50% on the growth chart. Her next appointment will be when she is two months old.

This was Harlowe's first bath, and actually she loves her baths. Her umbilical cord is still on so we couldn't submerge her but now that it has fallen off, she loves to be in Dustin's arms floating in the warm water. It really seems to calm her and she loves the water, although she hates the cold so the water has to be just right. Oh, and getting her out of the bath and applying the lotion, she hates. I guess the lotion is cold compared to the warm water. I always say, don't you love this, it is like you are at the spa getting a massage but she doesn't buy it. Maybe massage's won't be her thing, we'll see. Dustin has been giving her all her baths and he really has it down, because I tried to do it once and I was fumbling around and it wasn't pretty. Dustin is really great with her and he helps me out a lot, I could not have asked for a better partner. He is my best friend and a great father, I really could not have done this without him. Thanks Dustin for being such a great father, I love you so much and am so blessed to be with you.

Harlowe sleeping in the swing

My wonderful husband knocked out from a hard day's work

Harlowe's 1st doctor's appointment with Dr. Zuniga

As you can see, I am so far behind once again but I am going to stick with it. I am not good at scrapbooks or photo books so hopefully this blog will be a great way to document all the great things in her and our family life. This is her first doctor's appointment that I had to go to by myself because Dustin was working that day. Let me tell you, it wasn't easy and it was raining that day so I had to maneuver the umbrella, diaper bag and car seat. I tried to plan it just right, waking up at 6am and feeding her, then getting ready with just enough time to breastfeed her again before we left. Although, when we got to the doctor's office she wanted to eat again and at this point she was screaming and I was sweating trying to feed her but it wasn't working. I was new to the whole breastfeeding thing and trying to do it in a strange place with the hooter hider and in line for labs, so more or less it was impossible. It was a disaster, my poor baby was inconsolable and I felt like a horrible mother at this point. Well we got through it and she is still in one piece, ha. At two weeks I was feeling good about the motherhood thing, I was still in ah, that Dustin and I was blessed with this precious little girl. It is such a wonderful gift from God to be a mother! As you can see by the pictures she is looking a little jaundice (yellow) and I was trying hard to wake up every three hours though the night to feed her well so she wouldn't have to go back to the hospital or come home with bili lights and thank the lord her labs were good at her visit. She is asleep now in her swing so hopefully I can post another blog.

Dustin's mom at the hospital

Harlowe leaving the hospital with the cute hat our nice NICU nurse gave us

Dustin looking tired

Me looking haggard and exhausted before going home

I am still working on the blog, and you can see I am so behind. As you can see my glasses are crooked and I am looking like a grease ball. But my wonderful husband is looking pretty rough too. It was a long, couple of days in the hospital but well worth the wait. I still can't believe we have a beautiful little girl. I never thought I could love someone so much, besides my loving husband and my first baby of course, Harley, ha.

Well, here it goes, my first blog. Dustin and I just had a new baby girl, Harlowe Masako Different. If your wondering about the name, Harlowe is from the actress Jean Harlow and Masako is my late grandmother's name. My grandmother died when my mother was still a child. I still cannot believe we have a baby, it is so amazing! I cannot believe we are parents, but it is the most wonderful feeling in the world, besides the day I met the most amazing man in the world, my husband.

Harlowe was born October 8, 2009 at 0211, she weighed 7lbs 7oz and 19.5 inches. I was in labor for about 14 hours and yes I did get an epidural. I thought I wanted to have her naturally, but what was I thinking, I couldn't handle the pain! I had a fever during labor and my poor baby had to endure a lumbar puncture and multiple IV sticks, she was also on CPAP after delivery. She stayed in NICU3 for 48 hours for IV antibiotics and cardiac monitoring. And later diagnosed with atrial tachycardia but the doctors say she will probably grow out of it by six months of age.